| Dear Carolyn: Is it fair for my husband, who doesn’t enjoy gifting and major holiday celebrations, to spoil them for me? He grew up in a family that argued 24/7, relentlessly. That was their primary style of communication, even on birthdays and special holidays, and everything came with a price tag. I’m the opposite when it comes to entertaining, decorating, and the joy of finding creative, thoughtful presents for family and friends. He is more of an introvert. We’re well off, but entertaining is too much effort and gift giving is a waste of money to him. Instead, he buys one big birthday and Christmas gift for himself every year. Even though I try to make the most of each holiday on my own terms, it is still a deeply disappointing, inwardly lonely experience. To me, his outlook is incredibly selfish and narcissistic. I’m well aware that he may be incapable of change, but how do I rationally cope with my ongoing resentment toward his insensitivity? — Inwardly Lonely |
