What if we treated grief not as something to push through, but as something to make space for? Enter Rebecca Feinglos, the founder behind Grieve Leave, a global movement that’s redefining how we process loss. After experiencing the deaths of both parents and navigating a divorce (all before turning 30), Rebecca traded burnout for a grief sabbatical, taking time to document her journey along the way.
Her personal healing project has since reached millions and sparked honest conversations around grief in all of its forms. She’s helping others honor all kinds of loss—from breakups to job changes—with empathy, humor, and a side of realness.
We sat down with Rebecca to discuss redefining grief, finding joy in the chaos, and why making space to feel is one of the most powerful things we can do.
When did you realize that you needed space for grief, instead of just surviving it?
The realization that grief needed space rather than just survival hit hardest after my dad died, right at the beginning of the pandemic. I was walking my dogs the day after, and everything felt surreal. People were driving by, going about their Tuesday like it was just another day, while I was thinking, "No one knows that yesterday was the worst day of my life."
After this series of losses, I recognized my mental health had taken a huge toll. The shift came when I stopped asking "How do I get back to normal?" and started asking "What do I actually need right now?" In December 2021, I made what felt like a crazy decision at the time: I quit my job to take what I called a "grief sabbatical." I needed to stop pretending I could just power through everything and actually figure out what I needed.
You’ve redefined grief beyond death—why was that so important?
Grief can be felt from so many losses beyond death: the end of a marriage, losing a job, watching a friendship fade away, moving away from home, or even the loss of dreams you thought would come true. When we only acknowledge grief in the context of death, we leave people without language for so many other losses.
The thing is, we grieve all kinds of change. Expanding our understanding of grief gives people permission to honor what they're actually feeling instead of thinking they're being dramatic or oversensitive.
What are some ways to show up for others during major life losses?
The impulse to fix someone's grief usually comes from our own discomfort with their pain, not from what they actually need. Better support starts with replacing the urge to solve with the commitment to witness. Sit with people in their mess instead of trying to clean it up for them. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is: "This really sucks, and I'm here with you."
If someone is just beginning their grief journey, what’s a gentle first step they can take?
The most important step is giving yourself permission to call it grief. Whether it's a relationship that ended, a job you lost, or a future you thought you'd have, if it shaped your life and now it's different, that's a loss worth acknowledging. Once you can name it as grief, the next step is finding someone who won't try to fix it for you. This might be a friend who can sit with you while you cry, a therapist who understands your loss, or even an online community where people understand what you're going through. Look for someone who will let your grief exist without trying to solve it.
How would the world look if we supported grief better?
If grief were truly understood and supported in our society, everything would change. We'd stop treating grief like a temporary inconvenience that people need to get over quickly and start recognizing it as a fundamental part of being human.
One of the biggest changes would be in our workplaces, where policies would actually reflect how humans experience loss. We'd normalize grief conversations the way we talk about physical health. Instead of performing "I'm fine" all the time, people could share what they're actually experiencing. Most importantly, we'd stop expecting people to "bounce back" to who they were before a major loss. We'd understand that grief changes you, and that's not something to fix or overcome.
