Today we’re talking about the value of a gift that feels like home — especially during times of uncertainty. Plus, tapered candles to elevate any table and an on-sale red-light mask.
Recently, I chatted with LA-based cookbook author Molly Baz, who, for the past six months, has been rebuilding after losing her house to the Altadena fire. For Molly, the experience has been clarifying: When you’re starting over, stuff that feels like you, even small things, can go far — grounding you in the moment, reassuring your senses, restoring a feeling of home. While speaking with her, I was brought back to my own time of rebuilding, when my marriage ended. I have a distinct memory of ferrying boxes of my old life over the threshold of my new apartment. Once I’d unpacked, it was at once startling and comforting to look around and see my old life surrounding me in this new one. As I rebuilt my routines, I was relieved to touch these objects and feel them in my hand. A mug that for years held my morning coffee. A tall glass, its curves catching the light, reminding me to drink water. A sunny Dutch oven, promising bounty. And my books, like bricks to build a new home. These things reassured me when my sense of self felt brittle and strange. There are some special heirlooms that follow you throughout life, even when life itself looks uncertain or unfamiliar. And I’ve found that gifting or re-gifting them — to loved ones or to yourself — can sometimes help provide a surprising sense of grounding during whatever sort of rebuilding life throws our way:
Big, disruptive changes are doorways you’re forced to walk through. A major move. Parenthood. Disaster. Loss. Illness. Divorce. We have no way of knowing what will unfold on the other side, or how to reconstruct ourselves into the same-but-different person we need to be. In such moments, things won’t save us. But it would also be wrong to say they don’t matter. A potted plant roots us in a moment of care and beauty. A platter urges us to invite friends over. A spatula reminds us of our competence. The things we gravitate toward might be clues to the life we want now. Maybe even the life we need. Why not follow them?
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I’m looking for some gifts for myself. My home burned in the Palisades Fire. I lost my potholder collection (all different countries), a propane tank-shaped pepper shaker (!) from the Galápagos, and more. I’m moving forward with new purchases for myself. — J.S.D. From gifting expert Hannah Morrill: I’m both sorry for your loss and buoyed by your spirit in moving forward with well-deserved gifts to self. May I suggest repadding your global potholder collection with this charming chicken from Guatemala, this patchwork gem from Ghana, or this hand-stitched set from India? As for that peculiar pepper shaker, eBay has some excellent contenders. I’m partial to this tinned fish set, or for something more rugged, maybe you’d like these ones that look like shotgun shells? One last idea, too: This fish-shaped paper vase, made in Spain, wraps around a Mason jar or the bottom of a water bottle. It would be a nice motivator for buying yourself flowers today, tomorrow, and beyond.
Have someone who’s impossible to shop for? Submit your question here. One last gift (for you): Red light can make skin look plumper and firmer and minimizes the appearance of fine lines. At-home red-light devices are normally quite pricey, but one of our favorites, this powerful, versatile, and efficacious soft mask, is on sale right now. Was this email kindly forwarded to you? Sign up here to get this newsletter in your inbox.
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