Monday, July 6, 2026

Me, right, my inbox, left. [Universal Pictures]

How your email finds me

I'm experimenting with email signoffs to use from now until the end of September. What do we think?

Best,

Actually, to be honest, not my best,

Unwell,

Perishing,

Worst,

Hot only in the literal sense,

Uncomfortable all the time with no end in sight,

My skin doesn't usually look like the surface of a hot frying pan,

Hiding in the back of an industrial walk-in cooler at a local Chili's Grill & Bar until further notice,

This short summer haircut has backfired because I can't pull it back in a ponytail without little bits sticking to my neck,

Is this a heat rash or a sunburn or an autoimmune disorder?

Cooked like a leftover hot dog in a stale bun,

Jumping into the pool in all my clothes!!!

I regret doing that,

Did you know you could sweat so much that you actually start to get cold again?

Standing in front of a fan while holding a bowl of ice like something out of an Archie comic book from 1974,

It is both the heat and the humidity, Carl,

The day is hot, the Capulets abroad, and if we meet, we shall not 'scape a brawl,

Coping by pretending to star in "Mamma Mia!"

Stephanie

A live look at my spirit leaving my body. [Associated Press]

No more tube meats, please

How did we all do over the weekend? Stoic reflection about the country's complex history and current chaos state? Compartmentalization and stars and stripes overall shorts? Regrettable driveway explosions? We had a fun long weekend over here with ill-advised bike riding and dips in the pool. That said, I am so done with hot dogs and beer and mac and cheese and beer and potato salad and beer. I will be on a water and lemon cleanse for the next three days (not really, please do not cleanse, this is not medical advice).

In the spirit of staying hydrated and upright, I present this list of cool things to do indoors in Tampa Bay, from karaoke to niche trivia. I would love to hear how you are passing the time this summer between four walls. By the way, our team WON "Jaws" trivia! See me for all Martha's Vineyard movie lore.

Read it: Cool things to do in scorching hot Tampa Bay

Can you explain El Niño? Nah, ah, ah! This is trivia, which means if you consult your mobile device, you will be eliminated. Can you unpack the weather phenomenon without looking at your phone, or are you going to lose meteorology trivia for the rest of us?

Don't worry, Jack Prator and I have you covered in our latest installment of Make It Make Sense.

Read it: Explain super El Niño like I’m a giant baby

And another thing!

Reflecting pool Jell-O? Reflecting pool Jell-O.

Contact Stephanie Hayes at shayes@tampabay.com. Follow @stephrhayes on Instagram.

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